The Emotional Weight of Love in Black Relationships

 Aniyah Thomas

Professor Harris

English 2016

29 November 2025

The Emotional Weight of Love in Black Relationships

The Healing Playlist: 

  1. “If I Were a Boy” - Beyonce

  2. “Like a Boy” - Ciara

  3. “Don’t” -  Bryson Tiller

  4. “Your Mines Still” - Yung Bleu ft. Drake 

  5. “Wicked Games” - The Weeknd

  6. “Earned It” - The Weeknd

  7. “ I Don't Know” - NBA Youngboy

  8. “Needed Me” - Rihanna

  9. “Girls Need Love” - Summer Walker ft. Drake

  10. “Easy” - DaniLeigh ft. Chris Brown

  11. “Love” - Kendrick Lamar ft. Zacari

  12. “Pretty Little Fears” - 6LACK ft. J.Cole

  13. “Power Trip” - J.Cole ft. Miguel 

This mixtape covers the emotional imbalance of love in black relationships through the binary opposition of masculinity vs femininity that was talked about in the 1971 SOUL! Interview between James Baldwin and Nikki Giovanni. In their interview, they discuss how gender roles determine who carries the emotional weight, who gets to be soft, and who is forced to be strong. Giovanni argues that Black women hold the weight of love because Black men are taught to hide their emotions, as it makes them weak. 

This playlist begins with the song “If I Were a Boy” by Beyoncé, she flips gender roles and shows the difference between how men and women behave in relationships. The meaning of this song is that if I acted the way you do, you wouldn't like it, which proves Giovanni’s point that men don’t think about women's feelings. The next song, “Like a Boy” by Ciara, also switches the roles and shows what it would look like if a woman treated men the same way men treat them. This song expresses double standards that women are supposed to put up with behaviors that a man would never accept if it were them. In the next song, “Don't” by Bryson Tiller represents a man who wants love but doesn't want to put in the effort to actually love her right. This is what Baldwin was expressing that men do love them but don't want to show it, which would leave a woman feeling confused. In the next song, “Your Mine Still” by Yung Bleu ft. Drake, this song shows how possessive a man can be, but doesn't want to take accountability for why the relationship is falling apart. This proves what Giovanni said about men expecting loyalty, but not wanting to give the same effort back. 

The next song, “Wicked Games” by The Weeknd, represents the emotional numbness, using people to avoid pain. He expresses how he uses women to fill emotional emptiness, but won't give anything back. This matches Baldwin's point in Men block vulnerability because they’ve been hurt before.  In the next song by The Weeknd, “Earned It, " he expresses love through control instead of being genuine. This shows how men rely on dominance instead of being honest. In the next song, “I Don’t Know” by NBA Youngboy, he expresses how he doesn't know how to control and handle his feelings and relationships. This song proves Baldwin's point that Black men are raised to survive and not to communicate. In the next song, “Needed Me” by Rihanna, she refuses to carry a man emotionally. She points out how he needed her and not the other way around. This shows how a woman can be strong and not tolerate it anymore. In the next song, “Girls Need Love” by Summer Walker ft. Drake, she talks about how women want vulnerability and a real connection. She basically wants communication, but women are judged and called “needy.”  

The next song, “Easy” By DaniLeigh ft. Chris Brown, this song represents actually being in love and being comfortable with each other. If both partners put effort physically and emotionally, the relationship can be healthy instead of being left wondering. The next song, “Love” by Kendrick Lamar ft Zacari, represents a man finally being emotionally open without feeling like they're “weak,” and expressing what love is. This is what Giovanni was expressing that a man can be soft and show their emotions. In the next song, “Pretty Little Fears” by 6LACK ft. J.Cole, they both expressed how men can drop their guard and show love. They both admitted their wrongs and fears in relationships. This song shows emotional balance in relationships. In the last song “Power Trip” by J.Cole ft. Miguel, J.Cole represents the man who shows love through possessiveness and pride instead of showing it through softness, while Miguel represents the woman who expresses their love and is emotional. This proves Giovanni's point that women have to love for the both of us.

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